Relationship Female Adda
11 months ago
What Life Is Really Like as a Military Spouse

There was absolutely nothing that could have prepared me for being married to someone in the military, even though my own father was active duty military. There are no classes to prepare you for exactly how deployments, temporary duty stations (where your spouse is gone for up to six weeks at a time), and 18-hour days will change/effect your marriage. Each military member will handle battle injuries, post-traumatic stress disorder, and losing their buddies in different ways, ans as the spouse, you just learn as you muddle along. We learn to do things like Permanent Change of Stations (the name for military moves), write living wills, and sign power of attorney sometimes while crying, sometimes not. The constant in our lives is change - it happens at all moments throughout the year, and we are never in control.

Our lives can be hard and unpredictable, but we're families who love each other and do what we can to stay together.

I have never met a military spouse without dreams of their own perfect career, and it's all too common for our wants to take a backseat to our spouses'. We lack any amount of control over when, and where, we will move. Many spouses wonder "What company would even want me?," especially when our resumes look erratic and inconsistent. When some of us do manage to get a dream position in our career field, it's common to be met with scorn over our spouses' job - we're often ridiculed or accused of being puppets and war-mongers. The fact of the matter is just because our spouse serves in the military doesn't mean we support all military actions or decisions (none of the service members I know blindly follow). Like the rest of the country, military members and their spouses all vote for different political parties, but unique to the rest of the country, we put politics aside in order to serve the country. All of it comes at a great cost, and that cost is etched into many of our hearts.

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