If you've ever played Nintendo, read the entire Harry Potter series (twice), or watched every single Star Wars movie, consider this the next best thing to SFW porn. Two guys and their friends dressed up in costumes fit for Comic Con and spoofed Jason Derulo's "Talk Dirty to Me." Seriously, their "Talk Nerdy to Me" parody is a must-watch:
OK, since we know you pressed repeat, can we all agree that this video is pure lyrical genius? "Been to Middle-earth do you speak my language? Your elf ears don't need explaining." Awesome.
Curious for more surprising things that men find sexy? Check out what real guys said about their most random turn-ons.
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