Mixing sex and alcohol can be a tricky combination. One cocktail might really get you in the mood, but too many can ruin your libido and, let's face it, your memory of the evening. But get this: The most commonly reported accessory people note in their sex lives is alcoholÃ¢â‚¬”even more than lube and sex toys, according to data from a new sex tracking app and website called Nipple.
While we realize it's completely common to have a few pre-coital cocktails, we didn't realize it was pretty much a mainstay in a lot of sex lives. "So many people rely on alcohol during sex because they believe it lowers their inhibitions, allows them to be more adventurous and boosts their self esteem," says sex and relationship expert Emily Morse, Ph.D., co-founder of Emily & Tony. "Especially if they feel insecure about their bodies or ability to perform during sex."
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Those are certainly real concerns and a cocktail or two may help alleviate them, but Morse warns that you should be careful not to make drunk lovin' a habit. Eventually you could get so used to it that you'll begin to think you can't have sex without alcohol. Plus, too much booze can actually dampen your arousal. Not to mention, 40 percent women say they're more likely to have sex without a condom if they've been drinking. Yikes!
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Because of all these issues, Morse wants people to realize that you will not be sacrificing great sex if you ditch booze. "The truth is, sober sex can be much more satisfying because you're actually clear headed and able to notice and communicate more clearly what you need and want," says Morse. "You'll be more in touch with your body and the sensations coursing through it." Now, doesn't that sound good? We know it can be difficult to go cold turkey, so Morse recommends doing something else that'll help you loosen up before sex. "Massage is a great way to calm nerves and get you and your partner in the mood," she says. "If you want to be adventurous and have incredible sober sex, try lighting a massage candle and taking turns using the warm oil to soothe, calm and get you both in the right mindset for sex." The biggest bonus: You won't be too hung over for morning sex.
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