Ladies, here is my golden online dating rule: Do not talk to any man who has an ab shot amongst his profile pictures. You know, the ones creepy guys take with their cell phone while wearing just a towel (which always sits right above their nether region) in the bathroom.
I donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t care if he somehow seems smart or actually has the best abs you've ever seen. I donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t even care if youÃ¢â‚¬â„¢re just looking for a hookup and heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢d do the job, all right. Do not message him!
Here, my top 10 reasons not to touch any guy who has ab shots in his online dating profile with a 10-foot pole (or let him touch you with his 10-inch one):
10 / His cameraÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s crappy resolution works in his favor. 9 / Condoms donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t keep herpes of the ball area from getting on you. 8 / The photo was originally taken for his ex. 7 / He obviously doesnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t eat his spinach. 6 / The picture was actually taken in his parentsÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ bathroom. 5 / WhyÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s his face cut off? Is that really him? 4 / Is that fake tanner on his bathroom counter? (also applies to New Jersey guys) 3 / HeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢d be better off having Nair on his bathroom counter. 2 / WhatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s with the gold chain? (also applies to New Jersey guys) 1 / You deserve better.