This article was written by Markham Heid and provided by our partners at Men’s Health.
Not to be a fun-sucker, but getting rowdy while getting it on can be risky business, especially for his package. While living dangerously is pretty freaking great, sometimes when you play with fire, you get burned.
Sex injuries don't happen very often, but when they do happen, it's usually due to where you’re having sex—not how you’re doing it, says Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., a research scientist at Indiana University and author of Great in Bed.
Because your footing or other means of support are unfamiliar, sex in places like your desk or in an airplane lavatory is a lot more likely to lead to injuries than a complicated pose, says Herbenick, citing research from the University of Maryland. Even though both of those options sound fun AF—literally.
But because we care about you and your partner's penis, here are four sex positions you may want to avoid—or at the very least treat with respect.
THE EAGER CHIEF
The Position: He's standing on his toes while you're sitting on a counter in front of him. The sex is...spontaneous.
Why It’s Risky: Most cases of penile fracture—ruptures of the blood-filled tubes in your erection—occur from very vigorous sex, explains Justin Lehmiller, Ph.D., who teaches human sexuality and psychology at Harvard University.
If you're sitting on a countertop and he misses your vagina either high or low, his unlucky penis has nowhere to go but into your pubic bone or the counter.
Also Risky: Any standing position that has him on the tips of his toes. A momentary lapse of calf strength could send his manhood crashing into an unforgiving barrier.
THE OVER-EXHUBERANT SWISS BALL BLITZ
Why It’s Risky: The Swiss Ball Blitz may add some bounce to his thrusts, but beware: “Penis breaks will be more common in any sex position in which his penis comes fully out of your vagina and then goes back in,” Herbenick stresses.
Because the Swiss ball creates an unusual amount of up and down inertia, too much oomph could lead to his penis slipping out of yoru lady parts just before gravity and momentum bring you crashing back down on him.
Also Risky: Stairway to Heaven, or any pose where you're in the driver’s seat and the sex is especially vigorous.
If she’s on top, you have less control over the in-and-out motion, and so you’re more likely to slip out of her, Herbenick explains.
THE COWGIRL AND LEAN BACK
The Position: He's on his back, you're sitting on top of him. Rather than leaning forward with your hands on his chest, you lean waaaay back.
Why It’s Risky: Like an elbow or knee, his erect penis can be “hyperextended” (cringe) if you put too much or too frequent downward pressure on the shaft, according to a study from the University of California, San Francisco.
Over time, this hyperextension can lead to Peyronie’s disease, or a buildup of plaques that causes his rod to bend while erect. That can make sex impossible, the UCSF research suggests.
If he feels tugging—or even a small joint-like crack near the base of his penis, your angle could be a little too extreme. Try leaning forward a bit more.
Also Risky: The Reverse Cowgirl + Lean Forward, The Butter Churner, The Spider, or any pose that creates the sensation of tugging down on the base of his penis.
THE POGO STICK
The Position: Think of it as standing missionary. He's holding up all your weight, bending backward, and to facilitate the old in-and-out he's flexing his knees and bouncing you up and down on his penis.
Why It’s Risky: Anything acrobatic like this is a lot more likely to lead to back pain or strains for the guy, says Herbenick. Not to mention he could fall on your if his footing is off.
Also Risky: The Standing Wheelbarrow, The Ballet Dancer
Don't get us wrong, we're all about a little adventure, but consider yourself warned.