I want to use a vibrator with my guy. Should I tell him first or just pull it out next time we're fooling around?Ã¢â‚¬”Bree, Peachtree City, GA It's polite to let your partner mentally prepare for a dramatic change to your sexual routine, and you should be able to talk openly about sex. Bring it up the next time you're lying in bed, but phrase it so it's not about his performance: "I think we have great sexual chemistry. You know something else I want to try?" Then lay it on him. Say it would turn you on to shop for a vibrator together, and ask him to help you pick one out. If he balks at the idea, give him time. If he cares about you, he'll get used to a buzzing helper.