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1 year ago
9 Things We All Frantically Do Before Having Company Over

What you do behind closed doors is usually discreetly kept within the confines of those closed doors…until you’ve got visitors coming. The often-embarrassing remnants of daily bad habits usually need to be stashed, stored, or destroyed. Behold, nine things pretty much everyone's been guilty of—but only when company is on their way over. 

1. Scrubbing Behind the Toilet
Forget the inside of the bowl. When company is on the way, you head to the back. You wipe your porcelain down with fervor before guests arrive so no one is aware of the ungodly amount of hair and dust that normally canvases your commode. Seriously, you are disgusting. 

2. Febreezing Everything
Sure, it’s not technically a cleaning agent, per se, but it sure smells fresh and clean! You douse your entire home in it. No piece of furniture or accessory is safe: the drapes, your bed, the sofa, the love seat—even your cat gets a few spritzes.

5. Making the Fridge Look Abundant
No one has to know that, on any other given day, your kitchen is empty save Cheerios, string cheese, and frozen pineapple chunks. Nah, let’s make them think there are always generous quantities of snack and beverage options...because you're totally a real adult. Anyone want some Manchego? 

6. Putting All the Pillows on The Bed
Come on, don’t even front like your bed is a luscious Pinterest-worthy cloud 365 nights a year. 

3. Bleaching the Hand Towels
Be honest: When is the last time you actually cleaned those rags you’ve been drying your hands on for weeks? You can secretly admit your own grossness, but let’s not let any friends actually know how much your disdain for laundry is impacting other areas of your life.

4. Hiding the Dirty Laundry
You threw a towel into the washing machine, but who expects you to do the full load (okay, let’s be honest, more like four) before everyone arrives? That’s a lot of work just to convince a few people you have your sh*t together. Out of sight, out of mind, right? Just as long as no one opens the coat closet...

7. Concealing the Toys
We’re not talking about Legos and Tonka trucks, either. One would assume a lady’s vibrator would go undiscovered if it were stored safely in the drawer of the bedside table, but who can trust that nobody will snoop? You’ve got do some preemptive back-of-the-underwear-drawer storage action before company decides to slip away and “use your bathroom to freshen up.”

8.  Wiping Your Browsing History
You simply can’t predict when your guest might ask to borrow your computer. Or what if someone impulsively starts swiping through your phone pics when you only intended to show them one photo? No one needs to know how many selfies you took before your date last night. That stays between you, God, and your mobile network provider, thank you very much.

9. Making it Look Effortless
What? This palace? Oh, yeah, I just live here like this all the time...

All gifs courtesy of Giphy.com

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