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1 year ago
8 Different Types of Cries You Should Have in Your Lifetime

From Claire Danes' famous chin wobble on My So Called Life to Kim Kardashian's infamous Internet-breaking ugly cry, the varied types of waterworks out there prove that if sobbing is a science, it's also an art form.

Image courtesy of Giphy

Herewith, our oversimplified guide to breaking down (and owning it) like a pro.

dainty cry

1. The Dainty Cry
A.k.a. the glam cry. A single well-placed tear, a la Ingrid Bergman; no nose exhaust.

 

Photograph courtesy of Giphy

2. The Proud Cry
When someone you care about has done something really well and you just can't contain your feels. Oprah is a master at this.

 

fake cry

3. The Fake Cry
A few forced tears streaming from "puppy dog" eyes. See: reality-show staples (hi, Heidi Montag!).

 

Image courtesy of Giphy

4. The "How Long Can You Possibly Cry?" Cry
This is some deep sh*t, like when the grief hits and you just can't get off the floor, let alone leave the house. Don't worry, we've all been there—and recovered from it.

 

drama cry

5. The Drama Cry
Over-the-top, attention-seeking meltdown. Look at me, I'm SO upset. We can see that, Sharon.

 

Image courtesy of Giphy

6. The Surprise Cry
You thought you were doing fine, but then that person said that thing and now, oh god, here come the tears!

 

ugly cry

7. The Ugly Cry
Full-on slobber and snot, hiccups, wailing. Adele: We feel you!

 

8. The Happy Cry
When you really, really wanted a puppy, but you opened the last present under the tree and...OMG IT'S A PUPPY!!! Engagement rings, new babies, job offers, and surprise visits from friends are also pretty good reasons to happy cry, too.

 

What's your favorite type of cry? Personally, we prefer the crying while eating. Works every time.

Image courtesy of Giphy

To learn more about how crying affects your body, pick up the November 2015 issue of Women's Health, on newsstands now.

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